Marriage 101: Communication

In a marriage, many, if not all arguments can be avoided through clear communication. Clear communication isn’t entirely accomplished by saying what you want, but in saying what you want in a way that is easily understood by the receiving party.  Lets say, totally hypothetically, that a daughter (we’ll call her CutiePie) had clothes laid out for school that didn’t fit.  Now, in a panic, the father (lets call him Studly McBuff) calls mother (we can call her Mrs MakesUpWords) at work.  Studly McBuff: “This dress is way too big, what can CutiePie wear to school? We’re running LATE!”  Mrs MakesUpWords: “Get the khaki romper out of her closet”… Here.  Right here. This is where is all breaks down.  You see, as far as Studly is concerned, “khaki romper” is like some Indie Folk group that maybe opened for Mumford and Sons last year at The Fillmore and you’re judging him like some kind of hipster turd for not being cool enough to have heard of them yet like ‘Oh WOW, yeah, I own ALLLL their records on vinyl… I cant even BELIEVE you haven’t heard of khaki romper yet!’.  Of course MakesUpwords assumes this description is perfectly clear and she’s obviously thinking ‘It’s the khaki romper! What more do you want from me Studly McBuff!?! God if you weren’t so freakin’ sexy I’d just punch you through this phone right now!!’.  So, ladies… start with real words.  Instead of saying “romper”, try “dress”, that’s a thing that we know.  “Khaki” also apparently means brown.  Brown is an actual real human color that exists, and that your male counterparts will understand. If you’re really feeling the need for attention to detail you can even try ‘light brown’.  When it’s all said and done just remember one thing. Communication is 10% speaking, and 100% not my fault if isn’t working.

Disclaimer: All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons or events is strictly coincidental.